Tag Archives: Harry Shearer

01/11/2017 · 1:47 pm

The Joke Shop

Somehow, in 1987, I convinced my father to drive me to a joke shop in Paterson, New Jersey.

In the back, there’s a kiddie pool. JOKES, PEOPLE! JOKES!

The name of the place escapes me; it was unremarkable, something like “[X] Joke & Novelty”. Three years later, hunting for liquor and without proper ID, my friends and I were chased away from this very same area by a man swinging a chain over his head. Alongside Newark and Camden, Paterson is one of Jersey’s finest hellholes.

So getting my dad to drive me out there for gag items was quite the coup. I wanted a realistic fake faucet that could be attached to the forehead. I got much, much more. Continue reading →

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Filed under Bad Influences, Faint Signals, Idiot's Delight, Nostalgic Obsessions

Tagged as 1980s, 1987, Billy Crystal, Camden, Christopher Guest, comedy, Epic Illustrated, Harry Shearer, Heavy Metal, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, laughter, Martin Short, Men In Black, New Jersey, New York, Newark, novelties, Paterson, Pennsylvania, Ridgewood, Saturday Night Live, Take The Money And Run, Vincent D'Onofrio, Woody Allen

09/17/2016 · 3:09 pm

The Power Of Michelles

Not to put too fine a point on it, but in my experiences, girls named Michelle tend to be extra powerful.

As a dude, I’m not meant to understand it too deeply. I don’t know if spelling it with one “l” or two makes a difference. What I do know, is that if you value your soul, you do not mess around with girls named Michelle.

It would be impolite of me to get personal on this matter, so allow me to utilize a public example, and a shining one: Michelle Jenneke.

Michelle “Shelly” Jenneke is an Australian hurdler and model, who won a silver medal for the 100m hurdles at the 2010 Summer Youth Olympics. She won the 100m hurdles at the 2016 Australian Athletics Championships to qualify for the Rio Olympic Games. She received worldwide media attention in 2012 for her pre-race warm-up dance.

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Filed under Bad Influences, Don't Know Don't Care, Girls of BIUL, Uncategorized

Tagged as 1990s, 1999, 2012, 2016, athletes, Bruce McCulloch, Dan Hedaya, Dick (1999 movie), Harry Shearer, Kirsten Dunst, Michelle Jenneke, Michelle Williams, movies, music, Olympics, The Beatles, viral video, Will Ferrell, women

06/25/2016 · 12:56 am

Helping Millennials Understand The Simpsons

The world is tough on young people, especially when there are forces trying to control them, often by coddling them. Every awkward feeling teenagers have is commoditized and acknowledged, no matter how insignificant. Their bad moods are notated with special emoticons. Their hormonal bullshit is all validated as worthy expression.

This gag’s humor outlived the technology that inspired it.

Coincidentally, almost everything sucks.

I make an effort to be unprejudiced about millennials, I really do. I refuse to become the stereotype of the old man screaming at the kids to get off his proverbial lawn. But you have to understand the frustration. 20 years ago, I had to argue with people my age who claimed Quentin Tarantino was God. Now I’m dealing with the children of those people. Continue reading →