Tag Archives: Star Wars

12/29/2016 · 1:55 pm

Ah Leia Akbar

Carrie Fisher, the beloved actress who played the role of Princess Leia Organa in Star Wars, is no longer alive. You’re welcome for the update, recently-awakened coma victim.

There is literally nothing I can say about this. Literally; even praise will be feted as heresy. Legendary comedian Steve Martin, who knew Fisher, dared to tweet that she was beautiful when he met her, and of course the virtue-signalers can’t have that.

This is a gift from the man who made The Jerk and wrote Picasso at the Lapin Agile, you philistines.

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12/22/2016 · 3:26 pm

Unfairly Maligned: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

For your benefit, I will begin this article with a warning: 18 seconds of this movie consist of Shia LeBeouf swinging from vines with CGI monkeys. I know 18 seconds doesn’t seem like a long time, but apparently it’s an eternity for some people. It all depends on your perspective, or lack thereof.

The sequence is so brief, it was hard to screencap.

In 2008, Harrison Ford returned to the screen as globe-trotting archaeologist Henry “Indiana” Jones, Junior after a 19-year absence. I myself have been (to be kind) fanatical about Indy since Raiders of the Lost Ark in 1981, so before I saw Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, I knew several things.

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12/15/2016 · 5:00 pm

Invisible Legends

DIY stands for “do-it-yourself”. You knew that, right? It was once a point of pride in music production. People love DIY, because it lights that little bulb in the mind that signals “I can do that”. 

Ideally, you should feel that way about anything people do, aside from brain surgery or bomb disposal (and you can learn how to do those). Shoot, you could change your gender if you set your mind and wallet to it, but that’s a personal matter, and not something you want to capitalize upon. Still, there’s a lot to be said for taking a grass-roots shot at an admittedly lofty goal. For example, producing a homemade movie.

Random duders from an early series of Invisible Inc. ©Matty Boy Anderson.

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12/11/2016 · 2:54 pm

Uncle Owen’s Cabin

Deep cleansing breaths.

Some people are fans of something because the person that created it paid them attention.

I’m kind of curt about the fact that I don’t take suggestions from the audience. I don’t mean to be rude, but here’s the issue. If I take a suggestion, I am now beholden to the one who made it.

Not only that, I’ll have set a precedent, wherein that person will peruse my work in perpetuity, hoping for another use of the suggestion. It’s a kind of writer/audience codependency, and it’s unhealthy for either party.

It’s common practice in digital culture. Continue reading →

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11/25/2016 · 2:18 pm

Disappointment: Childhood’s Elegy

From BIUL III.

From BIUL III.

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11/04/2016 · 2:42 pm

Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail 2016

Last month, I kidded a friend that 2016 is The Year Everyone Died Or Sold Out. I figured if I joked about it, it might stop being true. Even though I am well acquainted with Fear and Loathing, this was the point where everyone else got acquainted with them too.

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Even I wasn’t mentally prepared for the comedians caving in. That was the final straw for me on social media: well-known comedians abusing their influence by endorsing presidential candidates. Try to conjure an image of George Carlin backing Richard Nixon. You can’t, because Carlin was a brilliant mind with integrity. Entertainers publicly endorse a candidate because their corporate masters told them to, and the ones that do are whores. Straight up.  Continue reading →

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10/07/2016 · 3:29 pm

The Nightbreed Chronicles

In a mere handful of movies, writer Clive Barker made an indelible impression on the world of horror. Hellraiser gets the bulk of the praise, with its puzzle boxes and flesh-shredding demons, but one of Barker’s lesser-known novels was equally imaginative. It was called Cabal, and in 1990 it became a movie called Nightbreed.

When you look this cool, who needs eyesight?

When you look this cool, who needs eyesight?

A movie that was… not all that good. Continue reading →

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10/03/2016 · 3:04 pm

Brian Froud’s World of the Dark Crystal

When crafting a fictional universe, where does one begin? The introductory story, the characters, or the world itself?

From the back cover

From the back cover

Today, the general process involves cribbing from whatever made the most money previously, and changing just enough to keep from getting called a plagiarist. Actually, that’s not completely true; your average latter-day Hollywood mogul couldn’t care less about charges of appropriation. Cash comes first, imagination and progress later.

This was not the way it used to be. Continue reading →

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09/19/2016 · 10:12 am

Thrills: A Retrospective

The life of a hardcore junkie.

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08/21/2016 · 4:58 pm

Animation Analysis: Heavy Metal

When analyzing or criticizing animated feature films, it’s important to keep three factors in mind:

  1. The talent
  2. The resources
  3. The date of production and release
Production designer: the late great Michael Gross, who gave you National Lampoon Comics and the Ghostbusters logo (for a movie Ivan Reitman directed that you might have heard of).

Production designer: the late great Michael Gross, who gave you National Lampoon Comics and the Ghostbusters logo (for a movie Ivan Reitman directed that you might have heard of).

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