When Mike Replaced Joel

By the year 1993, I was hooked something fierce on a cable show called Mystery Science Theater 3000. It combined everything I adored about weird television; puppets, obscure humor, cheesy sets and B-movies. One could learn about the golden age of TV from the well-rounded cast and writers, through their rapid-fire gags and “riffs”. Nobody knew it was a show that would shape the world of entertainment, and become a household word. It was just this wonderful thing we all watched for two hours on Sunday morning, instead of church.

Then word began to spread that the host and creator of the show, Joel Hodgson, was leaving.

Nowadays, you have the benefit of Internet and hindsight. We know it all turned out okay. In 1993, experiencing it firsthand was a wholly different story. Those of us who were considered “MSTies” (the fanatics) knew that incoming host Michael Nelson was already the head writer, and a capable one at that. But we’d only seen him in cameo appearances, such as Hugh Beaumont or the Amazing Colossal Man, and we had no idea how he’d fare as host. Plus, to be euphemistic, Joel Hodgson was the best older brother TV ever gave the world.

Joel created the MST3K robots both within the show and behind the scenes. The natural rapport he had with his creations (voiced by Trace Beaulieu and Kevin Murphy/Josh Weinstein) was bewildering in its rarity; how could anyone step into that position? And what did it mean that Joel was leaving? What if I can’t accept this Minnesota meathead as host of my TV puppet show?

As we all know, I needn’t have worried. The key is the Midwestern origin of the players; they understand how to make funny without being “mean-spirited”. I hear that phrase all the time. I have no idea what it means. Like, there’s a spirit inside a joke? And it’s mean? You lost me. My point is, humorists not from the Northeast United States can be funny without abusing people or doing a buck-and-wing on their dreams. Mike Nelson is a terrific example of this. He’s the next older brother- the one that hasn’t lived at home for a while, hung out with Dad a bit more, and only seems square until you get to know him.

Mike Nelson eased his transition into MST3K with two major contributions to the mythos; 1996’s theatrical expansion Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie, after 1993’s episode riffing the Joe Don Baker turkey Mitchell.

Within both of these entries, the writers pulled out all the stops. For twenty years, rumor has had it that Joe Don Baker wishes death on the Best Brains crew for what they did to his movie. The truth is, like Manos: The Hands of Fate and Pod People, without the crew of the Satellite of Love, Mitchell would have been long since forgotten. It’s not a good movie. It’s what our dads watched when there wasn’t anything better. It’s got John Saxon and Martin Balsam (Death Wish III). Baker staggers through the film looking as though he reeks of piss and sick, and Linda Evans is a hooker so unappealing, she’s introduced with a pan-up shot revealing… nothing. She is fully swaddled in a jet-black overcoat. You can’t even tell it’s a woman until the camera gets to her head. Mitchell is a stupid, bad movie.

MST3K transformed it into transcendent art.

I would venture to say that Mitchell is even beloved because of its status as Joel Hodgson’s send-off movie, in a way it never would be on its own merits. The riffs become Joe Don Baker’s internal monologue, improving on the plodding script. I don’t think anyone looks down on Baker for his performance here; if anything, the humor makes Mitchell himself closer to a compelling character. The original film seems half-finished by comparison.

I’ll tell you this much; nobody was affectionately shouting “MITCHELL!!!” before MST3K.

After episode 512, our fears were assuaged. Before we realized it, Mike had always been there, bejumpsuited in the background. Remember: this show was relatively obscure in 1993. They handled what could have been a messy divorce so well, us kids in the audience didn’t even catch the hand-off from parent to parent. There was nary a hiccup; Nelson was at the top of his game by the next episode (The Brain That Wouldn’t Die), and stayed there until the final cancellation. He took the gig very seriously for a former TGI Friday’s waiter.

Mike wasn’t the “gizmocrat” that Joel was, so the traditional “Invention Exchanges” with the Mad Scientists at the start of the show were phased out. This streamlined the glue-gun look of the program a bit too much for my tastes, but that’s the way things happen on the path of success. Mike was a more fluid actor than Joel, which allowed for greater character opportunities, and he was naturally theatrical. Songs broke out often with Mike at the helm, and lo and behold- we’re watching a guy who can write music and kinda sing. Joel was more like a laconic introvert; Mike was a better fit for the cable boom of the 1990s. Joel’s robots were strangers to Mike at first, giving new audiences an opening to the show’s unique concept. Like it or not, this is when MST3K truly took orbit.

The background in theater and TGI Friday’s wait staff; these elements combined with Mike Nelson’s youthful exuberance and comedy chops to create the frontman the show needed to compete with other cable shows. MST3K‘s two-hour running time was beginning to work against it, according to the suits at Comedy Central.  A gonzo idea was proposed, and the most popular episodes were halved into digestible one-hour chunks. For hosting duties, Nelson submitted to a grueling make-up process, after which he resembled Jack Perkins, host of A&E’s Whatever The Fuck It Was Called, It Was A Long Time Ago. And buddy, he nailed it. Nobody knew it was him. People just assumed MST3K had gotten the A&E imprimatur, at long last.

Mike used to bring his wife onto the show, and it wasn’t at all a bad thing. Bridget Nelson (née Jones; not the diarist) provided dead-on impersonations of “Mr. B. Natural” and “Nuveena, Woman of the Future”, both artifacts of riffed short subjects. She was a staff writer for most of the run, massive canonical contributions aside. Best Brains was stocked with hard-working comedy writers, who were honing their edge on the bounty of nascent and established humorists of the 90s cable boom. It was a joy and an inspiration to witness first-hand.

I grant you that Nelson has become rather corporate with movie-riffing (Rifftrax), however, this is the nature of 21st century trademarking and intellectual commerce. He’s being smart, which often runs counter to fun. And as we’ve seen, there’s room on the Satellite for both Mike and Joel. They represent differing yet equally important pillars of a genre they created. When friends get together to verbally assault an otherwise unwatchable movie, only one acronym describes the experience.

MST3K.

That is titanic cinematic (and cultural) influence. It’s like an all-inclusive form of playing the dozens. MST3K is the standard.

So it was that Brother Joel had to split, and Brother Mikey filled in. That’s how it felt; like a family activity. But… you people bring matches for Mikey?!